Time

There are some times in life that we become acutely aware of the passage of time. At other times time seems to remain static. It’s this experience of the passage of time at different stages in one’s life that I find interesting to note as it changes and lends itself to our spiritual and emotional development. I find that the people who have a higher vantage point to the passing of time tend to lead healthier lives such as they accept things easier and do not feel the need to control everything. In our process of developing as humans we need to be aware of the development of our outlook to the process of life and death. If we fail to evaluate and re-evaluate our internal response to how we chose to view the passage of time, we run the risk of developing chronic internal anxiety and restlessness as we cannot see the full picture of things. We become “I” focused. We tend to focus on instant gratification leading to unhealthy ways of being.

Relationships change, equations change, feelings change, people change, your body changes, thinking changes and most importantly your point of view changes. Out of all the above an expanded vantage point is one of the most beneficial aspects of getting older. We have a tendency to think that things will always remain static and people are ageless and will always be there forever until one day they are no more and the abruptness of their end almost instantly changes your experience of living, whether you are ready for it or not. We are never the same again. Death shows us our own vulnerability and tends to bring us to our knees in submission and eventual surrender to accepting it as the other side of life. The passing of a loved one such as close family member makes me think of my own death often. How would I view my life from that place in time? it brings about a healthy sense of vulnerability and calms the ego that is usually so "I" driven.

There comes a time when the people you dearly love get older and sicker and are at the end of their lives. This is a good opportunity to take a stock of your life and more importantly how much progress you have made in expanding your vantage point.  My beautiful kitten Emma often reminds me of this in a very simple way. She loves to climb up in high places in the house. When she was a baby kitten her only experience was of seeing people’s ankles, knees and calves as she could not climb up high. But as she got older she started to get to higher and higher places in the house and her vantage point changed dramatically. This was natural for her to do as it made her feels safe and she could see everything. She could see the whole house from top of a shelf. Our experience is not very different from what baby Emma's was- we tend to just look at what is in front us and forget that we need to keep climbing higher and higher (as in gaining more and more knowledge about who we are and where we are going) – about where we are in the whole scheme of things and how we chose to improve not only the quality of life our own life but others' lives too, based on the information we have. 

When I was a few years younger the sense of passing of time was met with anxiety and panic. I could sense it passing but did not know what to do with it, which made things feel out of control. What added to it was the life experience of being a stranger in a strange land. I wanted to hold everything close with a sense of intense urgency. That led to becoming anxious and feeling out of control within. It was difficult to let go and just accept that time will pass no matter where I chose to meet with it. Passing time is somewhat like a train that passes by at the different stations in your life. It will keep moving whether you chose to get on board with it or you chose to stay where you are. Viewing your life as a journey through time is important and I am just starting to truly get a sense of what that really means. Death of loved ones helped me develop a higher vantage point. Death helped me understand life. Time will keep moving on even though it sometimes feels like it has stopped especially when our eyes and hearts overflow with tears when we think of the loved ones who passed us or are in the process of passing us at some point soon.

Khalil Gibran’s words bring me a lot of comfort - “For life and death are one, even as the river and the sea are one. In the depth of your hopes and desires lies your silent knowledge of the beyond --- Only when you drink form the river of silence shall you indeed sing. And when you have reached the mountain top, then you shall begin to climb.  And when the earth shall claim your limbs, then shall you truly dance”